I'm Back. Sort Of.

I haven't been updating regularly--I know it sounds like a poor excuse, but I've been so busy just keeping up with kids, husband, and house that I haven't been wearing my writer hat as much as I would like to lately. I wouldn't trade any of it--well, except for my son getting pneumonia (which was just scary, but he's fine now) because it is just the rhythm of my life and I know that it will change, and someday, I will miss this.

I've printed out a strip of paper that says just that-- You're Gonna Miss This. This piece of paper is posted right above my desk where I can see it (and yes, I did get it from the Trace Adkins song, which I love) and be reminded that the kids won't always be so little and so busy. When I'm dragging my behind, drinking my fourth cup of coffee just to keep my eyes open because one or both of them somehow kept me from sleeping all night, and they are buzzing around the house like free radicals hell-bent on doing some kind of damage, I need reminders--believe me. They are wonderful, healthy, and energetic children who love me beyond what I can comprehend or deserve--how cool is that?

So if I don't post here regularly and the same picture has been languishing at the bottom of this blog for weeks, please don't assume I am just another lazy writer bad at regularly contributing to something (which I may be any and all of the above, just don't make assumptions--you know what they say about that, dahling.) Just know that I am being happily held captive by crayon murals and teddybear tea parties.

Happy Birthday, Baby!

Today also happens to be my little girl's fifth birthday. We have lots of celebrating to do--but I had to officially post it here so she could read it for herself! Love you, sweetheart! Happy, happy, happy, birthday!

The little boy in my eyes

My son, who is two, discovered something yesterday. When the light in the dining room was just right as he was sitting on my lap, he saw his reflection in my eyes. At first, he looked very puzzled. I had to keep myself from laughing as he stared almost comically deep into my eyes, raising and lowering his eyebrows as he watched the little boy in his mommy's eyes mimic him. After about a minute of facial contortions he smiled, grabbed both of my cheeks, and gave me a squishy two-year-old kiss. Then he returned to gazing into my eyes and occasionally resting his forehead on mine.

I found myself praying for two things.

One, that this moment could last as long as possible. He is one of the busiest little boys I've ever met and any peaceful moment is truly a treasure with him.

And second, that someday, when he is having a crisis of faith, especially in himself, I can pull out this memory and tell him about the day he saw himself in my eyes. So that I can then tell him what I saw--a little boy who was so sweet and easygoing as a baby that I felt guilty because it felt "too easy". A little boy who is now so loving that he squeezes mine and his daddy's hearts so regularly that he and his sister alone could keep them beating without any assistance from our bodies. A little boy who thinks he is (or would very much like to be) Inigo Montoya from the Princess Bride...I still can't have floor lamps in my living room because they resemble chandeliers and therefore must be swung from at every opportunity. A little boy who is so fearless that I will be gray by the time he is old enough to read this. A little boy so curious about the world around him that he explores constantly, endlessly, and with a passion and energy I didn't realize existed, even in toddlers.

I can only hope that when the time comes I can help him see through my eyes, not just into them.

Happy Fourth of July!

Just a quick note to wish everyone a happy and SAFE holiday--don't be the person who sets themselves on fire this year, m'kay? Let your idiot neighbor do it so you can point, laugh, and feel all smug and superior.

Seriously though, let's all pause for at least a second or two to remember that there are still some very fantastic things going for this country--things that all started with some strong-minded people who refused to back down from tyranny because they believed in freedom. Enjoy it.